December 17, 2013
In a
little-noticed news release emanating from the North Pole, a jolly senior
citizen has asked that his image not be co-opted this holiday season by the
Canadian War Dept. and NORAD. In addition, the gentleman, who identified
himself as Santa Claus, also refused the militarized escort that NORAD said
would be tracking his annual flight around the world.
"I
don't want war planes on my tail, and I don't want children to think I am in
any way associated with the type of organization that plans for things like
nuclear war and space warfare," Claus said in an exclusive telephone
interview with rabble.ca. "Your War Dept. misrepresents me the same way
the sales of war toys misrepresent me. I don't make machine guns and toy tanks,
and I certainly do NOT want an escort from warplanes or to be tracked by an
organization which is working to militarize the heavens."
Claus
was particularly concerned that NORAD uses this annual opportunity to glorify
warplanes and drones which are used to drop bombs on and mutilate children in
countries like Afghanistan and Iraq, noting that last week, dozens of people in
a Yemeni wedding party were massacred by a drone-fired Hellfire missile.
Santa
says he is disturbed to again find himself the focus of the annual military
public affairs operation, designed to normalize for children the idea that the
military – as well as military alliances which plan and constantly threaten
life on the planet with nuclear warfare, pre-emptive invasions, and
environmental destruction – is a benign outfit.
“I
also don’t need to be tracked,” Claus says. “This is the era where we are
learning that CSEC in Ottawa and the NSA are watching every move everybody
makes, and it’s getting ridiculous. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer has gotten
ulcers out of concern that every time he sneaks into the bushes to do his
business, it winds up on some database somewhere and could be used to embarrass
him in front of his fellow creatures.”
NORAD LIES ABOUT CLAUS
The
NORAD Tracks Santa website (www.noradsanta.org/) is a paean to militarism, inviting young children to
play at war and offering videos that are recruitment vehicles featuring martial
music more akin to a 1980s Tom Cruise bomb-em-up flick than a period of peace
and good will to all. Indeed, one four-minute video making the rounds of
community newspaper websites around the globe opens with an image not of Santa
but of bomber planes.
“One
of the videos says I did a test flight in cooperation with NORAD, which is a
total lie,” Claus said, bemoaning the fact that the tracking site features
numerous tributes to an organization that has the power, along with its other
“northern command” partners, to commit the ultimate act of nuclear terrorism
and obliterate the globe.
One
video features a small child (perhaps the son of US military personnel)
stationed in Djibouti, one of over 700 U.S. bases occupying the globe and also
the site of a command centre from which drones are launched in countries like
Yemen and Somalia. (Djibouti troops do not, notably, maintain a military base
protecting their own interests in Florida or Manitoba). While the child talks
of going to the beach and riding his bike, it does not mention that one month
ago, the African Commission on Human and Peoples’ Rights heard evidence on
Djibouti’s role in the U.S.-led (and Canadian-supported) rendition to torture
and secret detention program. (http://www.interights.org/news/130/index.html)
The
NORAD tracking site also features holiday songs performed by – who else – the
Air Force Academy Band.
“In
the same way the militaries of the world try to convince us that humanitarian
aid cannot be delivered without sniper rifles or bombing the heck out of a
village first, now they are trying to show that Christmas cannot happen without
all of their firepower, and that Christmas carols cannot be sung unless by
people who’ve been trained to kill,” Claus said. “Well, I have news for them.
The trillions spent on war are what deprive most children of happy holidays,
regardless of when they celebrate them.”
Meanwhile,
a heavily redacted Access to Information request appears to reveal why NORAD is
tracking Santa, and early indicators are it has nothing to do with his
protection nor his mission of delivering joy.
CSIS NAMES SANTA SECURITY THREAT
According
to the highly classified document from the Canadian Security Intelligence
Service (CSIS), “The Service has reasonable grounds to believe that [name
blacked out, but clearly a reference to Claus] is a member of an inadmissable
class of persons to Canada based on a variety of associations, travel patterns,
and other indicators which constitute a threat to the security of Canada.”
Among
those highly suspect findings, CSIS notes, is Santa’s long beard (“worn in the
traditional Muslim fashion that could inspire some radicalized youth to follow
bearded individuals such as Osama bin Laden”), his visitation to countries
throughout the Middle East and refusal to demonize anyone (“a disturbing inclination
towards supporting the human rights of Palestinians,”), his large donations of
gifts (“he may be transporting illicit materials that could place him on the
United Nations 1267 list, thereby barring him from travelling with goods that
could fall into the wrong hands”), past associations (“[subject] did attend at
Robben Island prison compound and provide material aid to Nelson Mandela and other
members of African National Congress, which Service maintains was, is, or could
be a terrorist organization”), has signed petitions urging the release of
immigration detainees (including children detained in refugee jails across
Canada) and in support of environmental protections (“Service notes subject
supports same causes as eco-terrorists trying to block oil sands development”),
and his failure to carry a passport.
“Service
also notes that Mr. Claus uses several aliases possibly as a means of avoiding
detection, including Jolly St. Nick, Kris Kringle, and, in a special code with
woman alleged to be Mrs. Claus, ‘tubby old sock,’ origin for which is still a
mystery to Service but further investigation will reveal.” Claus also appears
to be under surveillance for carrying of “suspicious” sacks, studious avoidance
of customs, and his “religious head gear,” the last of particular concern to
Quebec security services attempting to pre-emptively enforce their so-called
Charter of Values.
IS PRANCER A CLOSET MUSLIM?
CSIS
also notes with grave concern that at least two of Santa’s reindeer (Prancer
and Vixen) have been reading the Koran and allegedly discussed conversion to
Islam.
It is
not surprising that Claus would be the subject of concern to “security
services,” whose main goals tend toward monitoring outbreaks of democracy and
free-thinking inquiry while harassing specific targeted communities using the
same vague profiling against, for example, members of this country’s Arab
Muslim communities. Santa certainly does have a record of being involved in the
same social justice causes that everyone from CSIS and the RCMP to the FBI and
CIA have deemed threats to national security. For example, Santa was recently
arrested with Walmart workers seeking a decent wage
(https://www.commondreams.org/headline/2013/11/29-1), while the busiest
resident of the North Pole also managed to take an anti-drones message of Peace
to the Australian military (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=738RSak2yBI). Santa
also performed a tripod action for 9 hours in Glasgow this week to protest
immigration raids that break down doors and arrest and detain children simply
because they are refugees
(http://www.indymedia.org.uk/en/2012/12/504004.html?c=on#c290190)
While
Santa is proud of involving himself in social justice activities, he does get
weary of his image being used to glorify war, especially given that he annually views
the painful reality that is a result of relying on military might to enforce
injustice and resolve conflicts. "We see all the children of the world,
the ones who have lost legs and arms and eyes to landmines and cluster bombs,
the ones who have watched parents murdered with Canadian bullets and machine
guns in Iraq and Afghanistan, the ones whose only wish for Christmas is peace
on Earth, or the return of a parent or sibling killed by an aerial
bombardment."
Claus
has joined Homes not Bombs members on many occasions through the years as an
ambassador of peace through justice and goodwill. As such, he has been arrested
by Loblaws for helping distribute food he took from their shelves (to help pay
back the tens of millions of dollars in unpaid taxes owed by Loblaws),
protesting sanctions against the people of Iraq which killed over 1 million Iraqis
(this with the aid of the Canadian military whose warplanes are set to tail
Santa), the use of secret trial security certificates, the production of war
toys, L-3 Wescam’s production of drone technology in Burlington, Ontario, the
Hamilton War Show, and many others.
"There
are so many causes for me to support, and I want to support them all, but half
the time I'm busy trying to correct the false information about me and what I
stand for that's presented by the military and the media," Claus said.
"I barely have time to speak with you, much less all the other media
outlets who request interviews."
CHRIST CONTINUES TO BE DETAINED BY CBSA
Rabble.ca’s
interview with Claus was cut off when he received a call from one of Canada’s
top immigration lawyers, Barb Jackman, to discuss his travel options given the
increasingly tight Canadian borders for refugees and the possibility that he
may be on Canada’s no-fly list. Indeed, it is unclear whether agents of the
Canadian Border Services Agency – a federal department with absolutely no
independent oversight– will allow Claus to enter Canada, and there are still
many unresolved questions regarding its recent rejection of Jesus Christ, who
was deemed a failed refugee claimant and a threat to national security.
Lawyers
at the time had asked for information about CSIS interviews with Christ, but
because CSIS does not record interviews nor make verbatim notes, there was
little to go on. "The Service noted that Christ appeared unusually calm
when pressed about his possible association with prostitutes, beggars, and
lepers," read a short half page of notes which were eventually
declassified. “Christ also seemed hesitant when asked whether an individual
named Joseph was his father, a sign that he was withholding the true nature of
his character.” Christ’s anti-government activities also raised a
red flag for Canadian border officials.
Christ
was also deemed to be a security threat because he allegedly uses a number of
aliases, including Prince of Peace, Jesus of Nazareth, and the Son of God. He
had travelled to Canada, like most refugees, on a false passport, because if he
had used his real name on travel documents, Roman authorities may have picked
him up before he could have fled the country. Christ was also deemed
inadmissable to Canada because of his criminal record; he, like all refugees
coming to this country, are considered not worthy of being accepted even if
those convictions have occurred in countries where there is no due process or
internationally recognized legal system. Worse, refugees who have been
convicted of minor offences which would be deemed "summary" (or
lesser) offences if convicted here in Canada have their record interpreted as
indictable (or more severe) upon their arrival here, regardless of the
circumstances.
In
another mark against Christ, CBSA points out one particular incident in which
the refugee applicant was "particularly violent, overturning a table used
by moneychangers in a temple frequented by Canadian money speculators."
Canada's Criminal Code notes that a terrorist is anyone who "damages
property outside of Canada because a person or entity with an interest in the
property or occupying the property has a relationship with Canada or a province
or is doing business with or on behalf of the Government of Canada or a
province."
While
Christ remains in detention with hundreds of never-charged immigration detainees in Lindsay (many of whom
are again on hunger strike), Santa will no doubt be writing the phone number of
his lawyer on his arm in the event he needs to make that call. If there’s
nothing under your tree December 25, you may want to consider posting bail for
the latest in a long line of wrongly imprisoned migrants and travellers caught
up in the nightmare of Canada’s immigration regime.
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